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  What do you say when you're drunk?

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Shut the fuck up! You should just fucking smile and blooooow me! Because I deserve it!
-Mel Gibson

#308
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Jul 13, 2012 11:43 AM - Miscellaneous - by showdoo (man)

I swear I'm fine...{puke}

#191
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May 6, 2012 02:48 PM - Health - by tuxedo_joe (man)

finish your beer, there are sober people in india.

#193
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May 9, 2012 10:07 PM - Party - by affection (man)

I made a drink so smooth it went down like butter.

#295
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Jun 22, 2012 06:16 PM - Party - by leelothbitch (woman)

Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography.

#267
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Jun 15, 2012 06:40 PM - Miscellaneous - by Anonymous (man)

Beer has calories?, I guess I didn't notice because I don't wear a skirt"

#183
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May 2, 2012 09:28 PM - Miscellaneous - by blue (man)

When kids hit one year old, it`s like hanging out with a miniature drunk. You have to hold onto them. They bump into things. They laugh and cry. They urinate. They vomit.
- Johnny Depp

#152
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Apr 20, 2012 10:00 PM - Love - by Anonymous (man)

There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.

#258
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Jun 19, 2012 08:55 PM - Miscellaneous - by Anonymous (man)

My prude aunt welcoming me: Dillon! YOU SON OF A BITCH! (my name is John) ^^

#300
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Jun 22, 2012 06:16 PM - Party - by YMCMB (woman)

*interrupts in the middle of a serious conversation* So..how old is your daughter? I want to fuck her!

#304
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Jul 10, 2012 04:00 PM - Sex - by maximus (man)

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